It has been a long time since I wrote last due to many changes in my life. During the last five months I have moved twice, finished a semester of college started working full time and started dating a wonderful woman. Many who read that last part are probably saying "hold on a second, you said you were gay!" And that hasn't changed and no I am not using her to hide or try to change my Same Gender Attractions.
Rather I am trying to follow God's plan for me, namely that of becoming a father. Over these last few months I had to fight my demons and reach the point that I could say "Lord, thy will not mine be done". Admitting that I am not perfect and still need to change and progress is hard but it is also fulfilling in ways I never imagined.
As I mentioned in a previous post I am a member of NorthStar International and a local SSA support group. These organizations have helped me find comfort and strength during these chaotic months and provided me with friends have similar challenges and desires. I also dedicated a significant amount of time to writing an essay for the Voices of Hope Project. This was one of the most difficult things I have done in my life. It required opening my heart to complete strangers and also allowing myself to let go of anger and fear I didn't realize I still held.
As soon as the essay is published I'll post a link. Until then I wish you all the best.